I was chatting with one of my closest friends recently about how social media makes being a mother very difficult. We are bombarded with positive posts and beautiful blogs, and, naturally, we assume this must be what a person’s life is like all the time.
However, no one’s life is exactly as it appears online. I’ve already written a post about comparisons, but there is more to it than just that.
Many of us tend to put our best face forward to the public while behind the scenes we are dealing with many struggles, internal and external, that we aren’t comfortable sharing publicly. As my friend put it,
“I think most of us moms struggle with [comparing ourselves to other moms]. And it is definitely a bad place to be. We are all different, different family compositions and different skill sets. Plus, we never really know what’s going on in others’ hearts and homes.”
She hit the nail on the head!
For each of us, we had a vision of how our lives would look, and for most, our lives did not turn out that way. There is a grieving process that comes with accepting life to be something other than what you expected it to be. Even when life is beautiful and there is much to be thankful for, there is that subtle reminder of what could have been when we see posts depicting exactly what we had hoped for but do not have.
In Philippians 4, it says:
As my priest told me, rather than judge others or compare ourselves, take that moment to pray for that person. And then remember Philippians 4 and think upon the things in your life that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, and be thankful. Do not allow yourself to be consumed with thoughts that bring you down.
“How much time he gains who does not look to see what his neighbour says or does or thinks, but only at what he does himself, to make it just and holy.”
― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations